Tuesday, August 08, 2006 - 12:55 AM

FIREWORKS



Hey guys, I have not blog for a week as I was busy with projects and stuff and at the same time having lots of mixed feelings. I shall update everything now. Too many things happen in this week, and I begin to get sick and tired about it. I really had difficulties in expressing myself. And I really got to learn from you.

CFAS Project finally comes to an end on Friday. Currently, I feel neither happy nor sad even though this semester is ending soon. I really wonder, why cant we draw a line between work and play, or colleagues and friends? Is it really so difficult? I think you must have the mental discipline in order to manage it well. TO ME, when it comes to work, we might have different working style but once work, we are all friends again. One advice I would like to give EVERYONE is that, be honest and open about your feelings or opinion towards others. Hiding your true feelings does not benefit you in anyway. If you do not like the person, just tell the people politely, there is no point talking behind their back. Talking behind people's back can only make others hate you, or look down on you. I really so eager to share my true feelings, but there seems to be so many barriers.

Why is it so difficult for people to put down the past grudges and move on with life? What happened has happen, no matter how much you talked about it, nothing can be change. Can we just move on and return to the happy times we had before? I am trying so badly, with many sleepless night, walking towards the light of hope. I am also learning to let things go. Can we just forgive and forget?

One advice which I like to share is “NEVER JUDGE ANYTHING BY ITS COVER”. Looks can be deceiving. It’s the inner beauty that matters most. The response from many people about the first impression of me is that I am snobbish and fierce. But in the real fact, I am just shy on the cover, and I am a rather soft person. I get hurt easily, that is why I am always being hurt, but to others, it seems that I am always hurting people. No one understands the pain I suffered, I can tell you now; my heart hurts badly.

As I am trying my best to help others, there are some people who stab my back. To me, I dun mind making sacrifices for others just to see the smile on their faces, I just want the best for everyone, and I just want to share with everyone. No matter what is the response, I will still put in my very best, in creating the smile on your faces.

The night before the CFAS project ended, I went out with my best galfriend. We had a really good chat; we got so many similarities in personality, lifestyle and etc. We are really so lucky to know each other. After that, I drive her off, and she was very enthusiastic as it was her first time sitting my car. Haha. I really look forward to our next outing. Thx gal for the short yet relaxing chat.

The next night right after the CFAS presentation (where I can't wait to escape from the room), I went out with my friend for a sumptuous dinner and romantic movie. Our dinner was at Marina Suqare’s Billy Bombers. The dinner was really very relaxing, and the milk shakes and food there is real great. It ended with 2 scoops of Ben & Jerry Ice Cream lol, because she could not finish it. And I can’t stop rubbing my stomach after dinner. Right after dinner, we went to watch The Lake House. The movie is really meaningful, and was really touched by the couple. I strongly agree with the message of the movie, which tells us that if, we really like the person or want to do something, we should wait patiently and not give up. If there is a will, there is a way. This goes the same for everything you do, stay determined with what you do, no matter how much criticism you face. In the end, you are the one who determine your future, so go out for it to do what you like and want, as long as you know you are not doing anything that will hurt anyone. I give you guys my fullest support. Then right after movie, we took a spin around those clubs, with this sua ku asking so many stupid questions. Haha. After spin, we stroll down the aisle of Esplanade River, before taking a sip of sugar cane juice at the Glutton's Bay before heading home at about 2am. Thx gal for accompanying me and giving me such an enjoyable Friday night. *Hugs*

Here comes the iDARE pre-glow on Saturday at Sentosa. Woke up at 8am, and took a cab down to habourfront to meet them. We were about 20 minutes late. Sorry >< I was introduced to the group of fantastic green buddies, whom I had lots of fun with. Got started off with ice-breaking games followed by lunch and amazing race game. We had really had lots of fun relaxing ourselves, and at the same time able to come in third. The peak comes during the BBQ session where we laugh our hearts out, and eat non-stop. The food was great. Lots of thanks to all the chefs, you guys did a great job. Very happy and had fun knowing and chatting with all the SFs and iDARE friends. Thanks to the iDARE committee for planning for us such a memorable iDARE Pre-glow. You guys rock! Really looking forward to the iDARE camp in Bintan. YAY!

As for Sun, I rest at home the whole afternoon to get back the sleep I lost over the weeks. Had chilli crab for dinner, and thereafter I went to East Coast Park to roller blade for 2 hours. The feeling is great, sweated all out. Even though the whole 2 hours were mostly filled with sad feelings, where my mind just can’t stop thinking about you, I would still like to see you happy. All I could do is to see you from afar, and recap on the beautiful memories we had before.

The weekend seems to pass so fast. Woke up at 10am to give my friend a wake-up call before changing and left for school. Had a lunch with van and koon at canteen 4 where we missed the food there so much. Right after lunch, we went to meet aiqi to finish up the CFAS project. Sorry guys, got to leave early for some family prayer dinner, so could not stay back. Right after the family dinner, I went home to changed, before sending my mom to my grandma’s house. Thereafter, I went straight down to East Coast Park to meet Daniel. He give me a “surprise” when he bring two of his friends along. The friends was actually Venetia and Rongde. Before they arrived, I went to rent 3 roller blades and 1 bicycle overnight. Daniel introduced us a new friend, Xiu Fang. We started roller-blading at about 11pm, from ECP’s MacDonald till my house before making a U-turn and all the way till the National Sailing Centre. Rather tiring but was really fun and enjoyed myself. Get to know more about Venetia, Daniel, Rongde and Xiu Fang. Along the way, it rained so heavily and we got to seek shelter at Lagoon Food Centre. And we have to stop roller-blading, as it was too dangerous. I this blur sotong left my slippers in the car, so the four of them have to jog back, while I cycled back. It was rather amazing to cycle back with four blades. Haha. We managed to return the blades and bicycle at around 3.20am, before heading to Geylang Lorong 11 to eat the Dou Jiang You Tiao. After a filling supper, I sent Venetia home (only found out recently that we live so near). Reached home and slept at around 4.30am. Thank you guys for the enjoyable and entertaining night. Looking forward to our next outing =)

I had to go school this afternoon to attend the National Day celebration at 3pm. Went with a heavy heart, as there were nothing about school which can motivates me anymore. Had a rather bored celebration, so left early to meet Brandon in town at about 5pm. Introduced him to Food Republic for dinner, as it offers a wide variety of delicious food in a comfortable environment. After dinner, we went shopping where I bought two CK t-shirts while he bought one. We continued shopping till 7.50pm before going down to Marina Square to meet my friends. I was caught in a bad jam for like 40 minutes (Thanks to those brainless drivers). Thankfully, I managed to meet them in time for the fireworks. And the fireworks were really incredible and marvelous. I managed to record a short video of the fireworks, and would like to share it with you guys. Right after watching the fireworks, we loiter around, discussing where to go next. A few of them left, and the remaining of us went to eat Ben & Jerry’s Ice cream, sat down and chill. I headed home at before 12 and here I am blogging.

YAY! Tomorrow will be going for the National Day Celebration at Singapore Indoor Stadium. Wanted to celebrate with you, but I know its impossible. Hope I can control my tears when I see the fireworks tomorrow, and I believe my heart will hurt again. Good night!

[;n0stalgIa-n0xiD]